It seems like long-term celebrity couples are calling it quits left and right, and a familiar phrase is once again trending online: the seven-year itch.
The topic exploded after beloved couple Barbie Forteza and Jak Roberto and the popular tandem of Anthony Jennings and Jamela Villanueva ended their long-term relationships. Now, with social media star Lars Pacheco hinting at a possible split from partner Clyde Vivas after years together, everyone is asking the same question: Is the seven-year itch a real relationship curse? 🤔
Let’s break down what it is, why it might happen, and how couples can survive it.
What Exactly is the Seven-Year Itch?
The “seven-year itch” is a pop culture term suggesting that happiness and connection in a long-term relationship tend to decline after about seven years. At this point, partners may feel restless, bored, or tempted to seek excitement elsewhere. The phrase was famously popularized by the 1955 Marilyn Monroe movie The Seven Year Itch, where a married man daydreams about his attractive new neighbor while his family is away for the summer.
It’s not a scientific diagnosis but a concept that captures a common relationship slump. The initial honeymoon phase has long since faded, and the realities of a shared life have fully set in, leading some to wonder, “Is this all there is?”
The Psychology Behind the Slump
While the “seven-year” mark isn’t a hard-and-fast rule, the phenomenon of a long-term relationship dip is very real. Psychologists and relationship experts point to a few key reasons why this happens.
- The End of Novelty: The early stages of a romance are fueled by novelty and a rush of “feel-good” brain chemicals like dopamine. After several years, your partner is no longer a mystery. Your brain has adapted, and that constant buzz naturally calms down, sometimes being mistaken for falling out of love.
- Life Gets in the Way: Around the 5-10 year mark, many couples are dealing with major life stressors they didn’t have at the beginning—demanding careers, mortgages, raising children, or financial pressures. The relationship can shift from a source of fun and romance to a partnership focused on logistics and responsibilities, which can feel draining.
- Individual Growth and Change: The person you are at 25 is not the same person you are at 32. Both you and your partner are evolving. The itch can arise when couples realize they may have grown in different directions and need to consciously find their way back to each other.
- Complacency Sets In: Comfort can sometimes lead to complacency. When you feel secure, it’s easy to stop putting in the effort you did at the beginning—the date nights, the compliments, the small gestures. Couples can begin to feel more like roommates than romantic partners.
How to ‘Scratch’ the Itch and Survive the Slump ❤️
Seeing celebrity breakups can be disheartening, but a relationship slump doesn’t have to mean the end. The seven-year itch is not a curse; it’s a challenge that can be overcome with intentional effort. Here’s how:
- Acknowledge and Communicate: The worst thing you can do is ignore the feeling of distance. Talk to your partner about feeling bored or disconnected. Admitting it out loud is the first step to fixing it together.
- Break the Routine: Actively fight against complacency. Plan a surprise date night, take up a new hobby together (like a dance class or hiking), or book a weekend trip. The goal is to create new experiences and memories to remind you why you fell in love.
- Prioritize Intimacy: This means more than just sex. It’s about emotional intimacy—putting your phones away and having real conversations. It’s also about physical touch, like holding hands, cuddling, and making each other feel desired.
- Practice Gratitude: Make a conscious effort to notice and appreciate your partner. Thank them for the small things. Reminiscing about your best memories together can also help rekindle positive feelings.
- Don’t Be Afraid to Seek Help: There is no shame in couples counseling. A professional therapist can provide tools and a safe space to navigate difficult conversations and help you reconnect.
Ultimately, the seven-year itch is a reminder that a healthy, lasting relationship doesn’t run on autopilot. It requires continuous work, communication, and a shared commitment to keep the spark alive long after the initial fireworks have faded.
Jaja has a degree in journalism and took classes in international law and business communication. Her career spans roles at prominent international media outlets, including International Business Times, Celebeat and Delightful Philippines. As a news editor, Jaja covered a wide range of beats, including legal, business, economy, cryptocurrency, personal finance, gaming, technology, and entertainment.